Eleanor Lee Gets Candid About Fame

It’s been four years since Eleanor Lee was last on the cover of Harper’s BAZAAR Singapore. Since then, both globally and granularly, we’ve seen a never-ending stream of changes: we’ve got a new president, the British have a new monarch, AI is now a thing, and so on.

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For Lee, the last four years were a period of change too. She’s starred in new dramas and movies, taken on complex and unfamiliar character roles, and released new music that brings her fans closer into her world.

“Being an actress and a singer was never my dream job,” she admits. It’s late on a Thursday night when we get on the phone—Lee has just returned to China after spending a whirlwind 48 hours in Singapore. “I’ve always wanted to be a fine artist. My passion for music came only as I grew up, and acting soon followed. The way I see it, music and acting are no different than painting: they’re all ways that I can express myself most effectively.”

Over the course of the conversation, Lee admits that she’s a “very shy and awkward person”, and identifies as being an introvert in spite of having a very public-facing career. Yet, you’d never feel that shyness when you meet her.

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On the set of the cover shoot, Lee maintains a spirited bubbliness that keeps everyone laughing despite how tired she’s feeling. She’s cool in front of the camera, and as soon as the photographer turns to check the photos, she breaks out into a running man dance to elicit laughter from the crew. She’s so easy to relate to, that you sometimes almost forget that she’s an international star.

“She brings a great energy on set because of her bright personality,” the Thai actor Nonkul, who starred with Lee in the 2019 series Blowing in the Wind, tells us over email.

“As an actress, she wants to do work that is flawless, and I really respect this aspect of her. Yet she’s also really easygoing off camera, and sometimes she would help me translate with other crew members.”

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But in the quiet moments alone, Lee turns to the act of songwriting to find herself.

“I’m bad at expressing myself. I can never find the words to tell people how I really feel. If I do start to tell you how I feel, I tend to ramble or I may say something hurtful, which is pointless,” she says in a matter-of-fact tone. “When I’m composing a song, sometimes the end results surprise me because it flows from a place that I may not even be aware of.”

One such case is evident in her single, “FreeFalling”. Written in 2019 and released this year, the song opens in soft, pleading bars that crescendo into soaring instrumental melodies. It’s also a song that Lee reveals is a very personal and vulnerable track, as reflected in some of the lyrics which read “Tide is rising and / feel like drowning and / Tell me something and / save me darling”.

“I wrote this at a very low point in my life,” the Singaporean-born Lee says. “I was alone in China, and cooped up at home without sunlight, barely eating and losing weight, and just in the depths of a really dark place. One day, I felt the need to express how I feel. As I sat in front of the piano figuring out the song, the melody and lyrics came naturally. I was done writing the song in 30 minutes, and it felt like a relief to be able to find the release.”

Music aside, she also finds joy in taking on new roles. In the 2024 movie To Live Through Death where she plays Xiao Mei, a girl who became a victim of human trafficking, Lee wanted to expand her horizons and take on a darker, more serious role. She reveals that at first, the producers were not entirely sure of Lee’s ability to embody the nuances of Xiao Mei. Originally, the role was written without much attention to the backstory.

“But after we met and had a talk, the director felt that the character needed to have a story that is believable, and together, we came up with the idea of a girl who was blinded by love and tricked into this underworld,” Lee recalls.

Despite all of the trappings of fame, Lee still remains grounded. She takes her dinner not in the dressing room alone, but with the rest of the crew on the set of the photoshoot, amidst chatter and laughter. She gushes over Taylor Swift, and gets brightened up by a late night delivery of curry puffs. Despite being clad in CELINE—a brand that she grew up being surrounded by and loves for its “cool, youthful factor” as she puts it—Lee remains planted in her values.

“Even when she was a teenager, Eleanor has always been very down to earth. Her mother has always made sure that she’s brought up to understand kindness and the importance of hard work, and there are no airs about her,” says Emily Hwang, director of Atelier Groupe and vice chairman of the Asian Couture Federation. Hwang is also a personal friend, and recounts how at one point, her son and Lee had formed a band together with a few other friends while they were in school. “She has the biggest heart.”

Yet sometimes, grounded as she is, Lee still has to deal with the downside of her job.

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Increasingly, we live in an age where it seems like fans feel that they have a parasocial relationship with their idols; as if these singers and actors owe it to them to remain available without consequence. In August, rising pop sensation Chappell Roan took to social media to call out fans who were bent on invading her privacy and stalking the people around her, which launched a discourse on how far is too far when idolising your favourite celeb.

“This is a big thing that we often discuss in the industry,” she tells us. “It doesn’t matter which country you’re in, but there are always two types of fans: one type of fan really respects you and comes to support you, and the other type disregards your boundaries. With the latter, I’ve had cases where they’d stake out at your home, climb trees to look into your windows, and even try to bug your hotel room.”

All this can’t be good for Lee, who also reveals that she was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. Night times are the worst for her, because when she lies “in the dark, my head is at its noisiest that I get panic attacks.” Thankfully, she’s found a reliable support network amongst her peers to help her navigate these intense emotions.

It’s a surprisingly honest revelation that she drops towards the end of our call, but Lee insists that she’s open to sharing about it publicly. She’s even written a song about it, which at press time was to be released in the next two weeks.

“I want to take away the stigma because it’s not a bad thing,” she continues. “I’m just hopeful that by sharing this, someone out there feels less alone. Depression and anxiety shouldn’t define you. The song is about change, because it’s how I feel about myself: like the seasons, I’m constantly changing and growing.”

Editor-in-Chief: Kenneth Goh
Photographer: Joel Low
Stylist: Gracia Phang
Fashion: CELINE BY HEDI SLIMANE
Makeup: Shaun Lee
Hair: Gary Low / Passion Hair Salon
Photographer’s Assistants: Eddie Teo
Stylist’s Assistant: Crystal Lim